This morning at 5:37 AM, I came to the final, evidence-filled conclusion that my trusty Beagle and wood shop partner named “Dash”, is actually a genius.

He is an older gentleman now having just recently celebrated his 10^th birthday, so there was plenty of time for him to study his human pack members and pick up on their habits and words and actions. This morning offered another insight into his amazing powers of observation while in the kitchen. It was a normal day for me, a day governed by routine. I’m usually up at 5:00 AM; a habit I can’t seem to break from my working days where the first of my daily tasks involve letting Dash outside for his morning constitutional followed by the filling of his breakfast dish and water bowl. Fresh, cold, clean water. The boy does like his cold water.

While he munches, I have a decision to make on what I want for my own breakfast. The menu choice varies each day so there really isn’t any pattern that you or any member of my family or even Dash could figure out. What I chose to make today was completely different from the oatmeal selected yesterday or the french toast chosen the morning before. Today I would focus on protein and whip up some scrambled eggs with some Jimmy Dean sausage on the side.

Dash will gobble his breakfast; there is no nibbling with this dog, and he will politely sit in the far corner of the kitchen on a secondary padded spot reserved just for him. He knows to stay away from feet in the kitchen as I move from the refrigerator to the prep counter to the sink and then to the stove. He will stay seated but propped up on his front paws, with his floppy ears pricked up at attention, watching me the entire time. At some point in the process when I’m done cooking, he will get up to follow me downstairs to my desk as I try to keep from waking my wife with fork and plate clatter. Eating breakfast early at my desk while reading mail and catching up on news is also one of those habits I can’t seem to break.

The amazing thing I spotted this morning, was WHEN Dash decided to get up from the pad. I’m not completely sure what a dog can actually observe from a floor level perspective as we cook. I’m sure he sees my body moving around the kitchen and my arms above the stove. He can see if I reach into a cabinet for a plate. He can see me open the silverware drawer for a fork. He can spot me peeling off a couple squares of paper towel from the spool, but none of those final prep activities got him to move. It was only when I put the ketchup bottle back in the fridge did he get up and walk up to me ready to follow me downstairs. How did he know that putting the ketchup bottle away meant that I was done in the kitchen? Since I don’t put ketchup on my oatmeal or french toast, why was his behavior unique to this particular day? His reaction was simply amazing.

Yes. I know I quickly skipped over that culinary condiment detail but I do like ketchup with my scrambled eggs and sausage. Some people reading this will be grossed out, some won’t. Sorry. Not.

It was for me a revelation to be sure but maybe not a surprise. Dogs have always had an amazing capacity to understand human words, actions and emotions. They are intuitive and react accordingly to your tone of voice, your fear, anger, and apprehension. They understand when someone is in pain, and they even know how to tell time. I have examples for all of these things.

Words

We know to be careful when using certain words around the house because Dash will flip out or start to get excited upon hearing them. When one of our kids comes to visit we can say their names and Dash will run to the front door. “Jessica is here”, and we’ll see the boy tear up the carpet as he lunges up from a resting position. “Did you get the mail?” triggers a response where he will run to the door and point his nose up at the leash. He knows he gets a walk out to the roadside and a visit to the mailbox post where neighborhood dogs leave him a peemail. See what I did there? I crack myself up.

Dash has a pretty decent list of words he knows and will react to. Many of them are basic like sit, stay, down, go for a walk, go bye bye, dinner, cookie, treat, biscuit, easy, no, stop, come, play, toy, sock, ball, outside, come, get it, drop it, and many others. He can differentiate “go for a walk” from “go bye bye”, because for walk, he’ll run to the front door near the leash and for bye bye, he runs to the garage door and then sits next to the passenger side car door.

Emotion

If I’m struggling on the phone trying to resolve a billing or insurance or any issue and the tone of my voice starts to sound frustrated, Dash will leave the room. Even when I get excited recording narration for a video, he reacts to those elevated voice levels. If somebody is having a bad day, like our visiting daughter who didn’t get any sleep because of a restless granddaughter, Dash will sit right next to her leaning against her leg. In dog language that action simply means, “I got you, girl.” When you are happy or excited about something that has just happened, Dash is right there bouncing on his front paws along with you, often followed by a trip over to the kitchen counter where the treat jar resides. He will point his nose up to the jar to remind you where the goodies are and that he should have one. You know, just because you’re happy.

Pain

Though everything is fine now, my wife recently endured a series of surgeries, none of which were easy to recover from. Whenever she came home and we could set her up in her comfy chair for the day, Dash was always keenly aware that she was hurting. He would poke his nose gently at stitches, and then lay his muzzle on her leg and leave it there without wagging his tail. It seemed to be his way of saying “I know something happened to you, so I’m going to sit here and watch over you now”. When I had a knee replacement and was all bandaged up and couldn’t walk very well, he kept looking for a way to climb up on the couch with me as I recovered. That was until anyone went into the kitchen close to the treat jar. He’s such an opportunist.

Telling Time

That whole premise seems implausible given that we’re talking about a dog here and he doesn’t wear a watch wrapped above one of his front paws. But, if I manage to sleep just a little past 5 o’clock Dash will start to perform a series of noisy activities in the room to let me know I need to get my butt in gear. This little play acting scenario involves scratching at his collar to shake and jingle his name and dog tags. He will shake his head to make his floppy ears pop as they lap over his head. He will yawn and finish it up with a dramatic vocalization. If my arm happens to extend beyond the boundaries of the mattress, I’ll get a cold wet nose pressed into my wrist. “Okay, I’m up, I’m up”.

In the early evening, Dash knows exactly when it hits 5:00 PM. Wherever you happen to be at the time, he will find you, stand on all fours in front of you, staring at you in the face. He makes sure you can see him and he will reposition himself if you move. He never breaks the stare. If you don’t react fast enough, he does this fake sneeze thing. It’s loud and it makes you look at him. If that doesn’t work you’ll get a whine. This routine will continue until you make a move to stand up or take a step in any direction and then he will bolt up the stairs or across the floor towards the dog dish. If you happen to doze off in the late afternoon in your own comfy chair, you risk the wrath of the wet nose on your arm or leg. “I know you’re retired now hooman, and you like to take naps but it’s time for me to eat!”

Yes, I snuck another odd detail in there that might not resonate with you. When you retire from your regular job, short little naps become a wonderful thing.

The Wrap

So while I’m still marveling at that whole ketchup bottle incident from this morning, it was just another reminder of how intelligent our little Beagle can be. He has been a fun addition to our family and we hope for many more years to come with him. I like cats too and for some strange reason even stand offish cats seem to gravitate towards me, but I’ve always been a dog person. I love everything about this little guy except maybe for the attitude we get once in a while if we’re not watching the clock like he does.

Oh and yes. Daylight Savings Time changes are a nightmare to normalize with this guy. It takes weeks of “It’s not time” to get his body clock to adjust properly. “It’s not time” is another phrase he hates but he clearly understands. Sorry dude. You’re going to get fed eventually, I promise.